Reality Check

I quickly rushed past the artwork lining the walls, running a minute or two behind (as usual). After sneaking unnoticed into the classroom door, I promptly took a seat, hunching a little lower as I sat in a preschooler-sized chair. He didn’t see me at first, he was too busy listening intently to his teacher’s instructions about centers (which I was secretly proud of). Just a few seconds later, our eyes met and his face beamed with a gigantic smile. He looked at me with bright eyes and waved as he remained seated at circle time. He leaned over to the little girl sitting next to him and whisper-yelled, “That’s my Mommy!!! My Mommy’s here! She’s helping teach the class today!”

The truth is that I volunteered for about an hour…helping the kids in my son’s preschool class with their handwriting books. But one would have thought I was a celebrity guest with the excitement that Big Brother exuded that his Mommy was helping in his class. As I was relishing in the thoughts that my little boy was excited and proud to have me in his class and meeting all of his new friends…the following thought hit me like a ton of bricks:

In a few short years, my little boy probably isn’t going to beam when he sees me enter his classroom. At best, he’ll smile, wave,  and sheepishly return to his work. At worst, he’ll ignore me altogether (although I can’t imagine my sweet, sensitive boy ever acting this way).

The thought of this literally breaks my heart.

Where has the time gone? Where is the time going?

“The days drag on but the years fly by.” This quote perfectly captures motherhood so far, although certainly not all the days drag on. But the reality hit me this past week. Big Brother is almost five and Little Brother will turn three in a few short weeks. How did that happen?  What happened to my babies?

This “reality check” has got me thinking. I need to make enjoying my kids a priority on a daily basis. I know that seems silly and obvious to even say, but I fear there are some days that I let sneak by…busying myself with keeping up with the house, laundry, and this blog that I don’t really enjoy them.

Rock Little Brother for a few minutes, enjoy them.

Sing silly songs at the top of our lungs, enjoy them.

Read just one more book (even though it’s already past naptime), enjoy them.

Laugh, tickle, and cuddle, enjoy them.

That kind of enjoyment. And not just enjoyment, but including my kids in acts of service and engaging in meaningful real-life relationships. I need a little more of that. Which means I need a little less of other things…including this blog that I love so much.

I’m going to slow down a little bit in the blogging scene. I’m probably not going to post every day (unless I have a plethora of ideas that I can share without feeling like I am taking extra time away from my kids), but I am going to aim to post around 4 times per week. Less quantity and greater quality is what I’m aiming for!

I hope you understand…but I’m fairly certain that you already do because I imagine that you yourself have been where I am, trying to prioritize your children over less-important things in life. Don’t get me wrong…you are important to me. But my kids are more important, which is how it should be.

Now I’m just trying to figure out how I can outsource laundry…all in the name of spending more time enjoying the kids, of course. ;)

 

24 Comments

  1. This is something that I struggle with, too. I am lucky to be able to work from home, but often the work takes me away from my kids and distracts me more than I would like, so my husband and I are going to reevaluate my workload. My oldest is 8, so I know how fast they grow.

    Good for you on your decision. You won’t regret it, and people will still keep coming to your blog.

  2. Yes! Awesome Jenae :) Sounds like a spectacular idea, & the reason I’ve been slowing down a little too. Trying to find a balance, trying to make time to dance with V when a silly song comes on, trying to actively take in little T while he is still little & doesn’t mind mama kissing all over his pudgy neck :) I praise you and can honestly say, I understand with a full & complete heart. Enjoy your babies, we are not going anywhere :)

    xx m

  3. God gave us MOM’s these precious gifts, and you are totally doing the right thing, I applaud you because it takes some, a very long time after their kids have gone to understand that the time you spend with them, is soo very precious!!!!!!! enjoy your little ones, and I know that they will enjoy seeing you no matter what stage of life they are going through, because they’ll see, feel the love you have for them……………… God bless you and your family

  4. Thanks for the reminder, Jenae. My blog isn’t nearly as popular as yours but I’m learning that it’s okay not to blog for a few days or just three or four days a week if it’s taking away from time with my family. I try each day to remind myself too that “the days are long but the years are short!” Blessings to you as you continue to make more time for the “greater things”. :)

  5. Grabbing the box of Kleenex because time does go by too quickly. They so want our attention right now . . . and it won’t be like this forever. I know exactly what you mean. I’ve been doing a lot of re-examining how I spend my time. I don’t think you’ll regret cutting back on blogging. Have a GREAT week with the kids!

  6. Love you, Jenae! I think you’re making a great choice — not that it matters what I think! Following God and being obedient is much more important than blogging, building a platform, or any of that stuff. In the end, you’ll be so grateful for the time you spent with your little ones.

  7. Good for you! I totally agree with all the others. God has been telling me “wait” with my writing. Fiction for sure (no more books for a long while) and serious blogging. I’m doing a tiny bit, but really feel like it’s not where my focus is supposed to be for now. It’s hard because I do love it so, and have millions of ideas swirling around in my head, but God gave me the picture of the Israelites the other day–not only did he give them the signal to “GO” and they had to obediently follow in faith, he also gave them the signal to “STOP” and they obediently stopped in faith. Not that you’re stopping, but you are listening to God’s prompting about how fast and how far to go and obeying. Life will go on, blogs will come and go, but your children are only there for a short time. You’re a good Mommy and your children are precious! :)

  8. This is exactly how I feel. There are so many things that compete for our time. I went to visit my daughter at her preschool a couple of weeks ago and she was so excited to see me and I went through the same feelings that you are experiencing. I know some day she’ll be embarrassed by her mommy. My kids (2 and 3) want to spend almost all their time with my husband and me and sometimes stuff just needs to get done. But sometimes it doesn’t need to get done right now and before long, they won’t want to cuddle and play with mommy and daddy. I know I personally would rather put off some things for now to be able to have more time with my precious family. These times won’t last too long. I look forward to your posts and fewer is absolutely fine with me. :)

  9. I am sitting here crying my eyes out. Today is Kindergarten regristration for my 2 boys (I know it is early for next year). I have been feeling like this for many days, and weeks! I know I will make it through this day but I am having a hard time already. Maybe since I am crying now it won’t be so bad once I get there.

  10. Thanks for being real and posting!! You have a great blog and it is a blessing to others, but more importantly are your little blessings. I don’t have a blog, but often get caught up in taking care of our house, making sure everytthing is just so. I need reminders like this to remember what a blessing our little ones. Reading Be the Mom, was a great reminder for me to be the Mom God wants me to be. Thanks and enjoy your time with you little ones!!!

    Crazy Blessed,
    Rebecca

  11. Thank you for being so real. I loved this! *tear* I too have two boys, eacha year younger than yours. I’ve turned laundry into a joint activity that they now love. We race to put in and switch a load in the morning before breakfast, about 5min only now after months of practice and big brother and I race to fold in Tue afternoon while little brother naps. He’s gotten fast! Jointly takes us less than 10 min for a load of towels and I love to know that I’m not only investing in teaching him a life habbit, but hoping he years from now he’ll associate something as simple as laundry with moms love. I look forward to the conversations we might have over a load of laundry years down the road. :)

  12. This post hits home, as I have been feeling that my girls aren’t getting the attention they need/deserve. I am transitioning to a SAHM and learning to be ok with a schedule that isn’t packed full. thank you for this reminder….“The days drag on but the years fly by.”

  13. I think is one of the best decisions you have made. I wish I can do the same. I’m making my master degree, it takes a lot of time, so sometimes I feel I´m loosing a lot of time and fun with my kids that I won´t get back. Congrats!!!!

  14. I have 7 kids.O ldest group 23,22,20, 19 and 6,5,4. What I know the most is that you are going to blink and they will be young adults and then again… adults. With my youngest group things are not so serious to me anymore. I do what I can and when I can’t…. I don’t. No sense kicking myself for it. Sometimes God wants us to STOP, RELAX, and ENJOY is creation. Everything has a season… sometimes the best season is one of simple rest. :D

  15. I undertand you! I married again 5 years ago and now have two amazing kids 4 y/o girl 2 y/o boy and four olders (two mine 27 / 22 ladies and two my hubby 25 men 22 lady, all live with us!), some times I stop blogging and enjoy more my kids. Belive me: grow up so quikly, enjoy every moment! Congrats!
    Joa

  16. Hey Jenae,
    I totally understand. Since going back to work full time this year as a kindergarten teacher I have set my sights on posting 1x a week and even fail at that right now. Thankfully, my crowd is small, but loyal. I’m embracing this new season and all its changes…even though I don’t like all of them…I know God is guiding me through. I do have to remind myself of that every day…sometimes numerous times!

  17. My mom used to pay per pound at a local laundromat for our laundry to be done – they even picked it up and delivered it folded. Just an idea :)

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