I quickly rushed past the artwork lining the walls, running a minute or two behind (as usual). After sneaking unnoticed into the classroom door, I promptly took a seat, hunching a little lower as I sat in a preschooler-sized chair. He didn’t see me at first, he was too busy listening intently to his teacher’s instructions about centers (which I was secretly proud of). Just a few seconds later, our eyes met and his face beamed with a gigantic smile. He looked at me with bright eyes and waved as he remained seated at circle time. He leaned over to the little girl sitting next to him and whisper-yelled, “That’s my Mommy!!! My Mommy’s here! She’s helping teach the class today!”
The truth is that I volunteered for about an hour…helping the kids in my son’s preschool class with their handwriting books. But one would have thought I was a celebrity guest with the excitement that Big Brother exuded that his Mommy was helping in his class. As I was relishing in the thoughts that my little boy was excited and proud to have me in his class and meeting all of his new friends…the following thought hit me like a ton of bricks:
In a few short years, my little boy probably isn’t going to beam when he sees me enter his classroom. At best, he’ll smile, wave, and sheepishly return to his work. At worst, he’ll ignore me altogether (although I can’t imagine my sweet, sensitive boy ever acting this way).
The thought of this literally breaks my heart.
Where has the time gone? Where is the time going?
“The days drag on but the years fly by.” This quote perfectly captures motherhood so far, although certainly not all the days drag on. But the reality hit me this past week. Big Brother is almost five and Little Brother will turn three in a few short weeks. How did that happen? What happened to my babies?
This “reality check” has got me thinking. I need to make enjoying my kids a priority on a daily basis. I know that seems silly and obvious to even say, but I fear there are some days that I let sneak by…busying myself with keeping up with the house, laundry, and this blog that I don’t really enjoy them.
Rock Little Brother for a few minutes, enjoy them.
Sing silly songs at the top of our lungs, enjoy them.
Read just one more book (even though it’s already past naptime), enjoy them.
Laugh, tickle, and cuddle, enjoy them.
That kind of enjoyment. And not just enjoyment, but including my kids in acts of service and engaging in meaningful real-life relationships. I need a little more of that. Which means I need a little less of other things…including this blog that I love so much.
I’m going to slow down a little bit in the blogging scene. I’m probably not going to post every day (unless I have a plethora of ideas that I can share without feeling like I am taking extra time away from my kids), but I am going to aim to post around 4 times per week. Less quantity and greater quality is what I’m aiming for!
I hope you understand…but I’m fairly certain that you already do because I imagine that you yourself have been where I am, trying to prioritize your children over less-important things in life. Don’t get me wrong…you are important to me. But my kids are more important, which is how it should be.
Now I’m just trying to figure out how I can outsource laundry…all in the name of spending more time enjoying the kids, of course. ;)