After reading this article about the scathing book that Martha Stewart’s daughter recently wrote about her childhood as the domestic diva’s daughter, it seems to be a trend (especially among celebrities) to blame your parents for all your problems.
I’m sure my kids wouldn’t have any trouble filling the pages of a book with all my flaws, poor judgements, and mistakes as a parent! But I would hope that once they are grown, they will have some respect towards their sinful and flawed mother who loved them more than life itself.
Martha Stewart’s daughter must have felt justified in writing the book because her mom obviously wasn’t perfect. She spent time in jail, for crying out loud. I get it. Everyone is imperfect. Everyone has flaws. Everyone makes mistakes (sometimes huge mistakes). Sometimes people can hurt us beyond repair.
However, despite all the ways our parents might have messed up, they are still our parents. God gave them to us for a reason in the same way that we are the parents of our children for a reason.
“Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— “so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.” -Ephesians 6: 2-3
Our children won’t learn how to respect and honor others unless we are their example. Our society certainly won’t teach them…you can’t even turn on the TV without hearing horrible attacks about one politician or another. If we want to ensure that our children grow up to be respectful of us as well as others, we have to start showing respect. Talking negatively about others (even those who are public figures) is simply not setting a good example.
“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” -Ephesians 4:29
I am so very blessed to have been raised by two amazing individuals who loved God, each other, and all five of us kids. I truly admire and respect both of my parents. They are imperfect and have made mistakes, but they taught us what it means to be in a relationship with God…the best gift they could have ever given me.
I understand that not everyone had such a Christ-centered upbringing. Some people had just plain crummy parents, but even so…we need to be careful how we talk about them, especially when our children are listening. If we need to problem solve or even just vent to someone, we just need to remember to do it out of the earshot of our children…or else they might be saying those same things about us someday!